The grip ... You must surely often hear this word without necessarily understanding what it means. The hold of those who hurt us. The hold that prevents speaking, that paralyzes.

In addition to this, you need to know more about it.

Yeah but do you know what that word means? Maybe, without knowing it, this hold is holding you back too. So, for the dictionary, the hold we are talking about here is the domination exercised by a person over one or more others and which results in him taking possession of his mind or his will.

In addition to this, you need to know more about it.

The spider weaves a web why do it? So that an insect that flies quietly gets caught. So it is impossible for him to move. Oh at the beginning he struggles a little but by force he gets exhausted. So here it is at the mercy of the spider who can devour it as it pleases. When you are a victim, you are the insect and your aggressor is the spider. The canvas is the grip!

In addition to this, you need to know more about it.

So that you understand even better, I will tell you about me. Me, it's my big brother who hurt me when I was 6 years old. But, my big brother, he was my hero. I wanted to do everything like him. He was my role model. Also, when he hurt me, and asked me not to say anything, otherwise we would no longer be brothers and well ... I listened to him.

In addition to this, you need to know more about it.

He had great power over me, a "domination". And it was because of this power he had over me that I kept silent, despite all the harm he was doing me. I wanted to talk, to say all the bad things he was doing to me, but the words didn't come out. My brother had seized my will. This is the hold. It is because of this hold that we let ourselves be taken. It is because of this hold that we are silent.

In addition to this, you need to know more about it.

You will notice that most of the time, those who hurt us are people who exercise some form of authority over us. Because they are part of our family. Because they are the tallest or the strongest in school. Because they are our coaches or the religious who guide us.

In addition to this, you need to know more about it.

But, whatever their authority, their role, their importance to you, the love you have for them, there are things that these people are not allowed to do to you, these offenses that we have already talked about and which are prohibited by law and which make you a victim.

In addition to this, you need to know more about it.

Getting rid of their hold is difficult. I know it. It took me over 30 years to get rid of my brother's. But suddenly, I know how necessary it is to get rid of this hold.

In addition to this, you need to know more about it.

This is why you will find here, on the site, a Virtual Butterfly Mailbox , to help you free yourself from these invisible chains that connect you to your attacker. This is why soon, I hope, you will find butterfly mailboxes in your school.

In addition to this, you need to know more about it.

Don't listen to everything your abuser tells you. No doubt you will lose him if you say the wrong he does to you. But, if you keep silent , you will lose someone so much more important: you!